I quite often forget about this being a transition blog. Although I suppose technically it’s now a transitioned blog. But today, I do have to admit that even after my op, there are still questions about my own transition. And most of those questions I have left boil down to the one broad category. What happens next?
I’ve already worked out who I am. What I am is a trickier thing to pin down but an area of constantly shifting progress. Despite a somewhat finalising surgery, I currently occupy an odd sort of middle ground. I’m no longer one thing but not fully another either. And that’s OK.
It is very tempting to think of surgery as the answer. I think it’s just an answer. Because there’s a further journey ahead. Most of which centres around discovering what sort of woman I want to be, now that the physical part is done.
In my third month Post Op, it seems I might have the potential to be a fairly relaxed woman. At least initially. I’m perfectly happy with untamed Denis Healey eyebrows, an ever-expanding paunch and occasionally noticing that the hair on my shapely pins is a slight shade towards Rapunzel much of the time.
Just Beyonce up my brows a little please!
At the start of my journey I’d never have allowed myself any of those things. But in the here and now, I care less about the purely cosmetic aspects of femininity.
What I have discovered quickly is that I know Hee Haw about piloting my new body as successfully as may be possible. This is also OK. I have time and perhaps Baby Steps are the way forward now. I’m going to continue learning I expect and there are new experiences to be had. I’m enthusiastically open to all of them. But at this exact point, I can only tell you this much, a map wouldn’t be amiss.
singlewhiteshemale 