Suffer Little Children

That my friends came with me on my transition is something I am going to be eternally grateful for. That they extended that acceptance to their children and actively fostered it in them was also more than I’d ever felt able to expect. Certainly more than my own flesh and blood were able to manage.

Although, truth be told, even estrangement from my brothers and nephews is something I understand. The most difficult part being that, particularly with my nephews, it was about protecting them. And not from me as it happens. Just how society can be when you are perceiveably different from the norm. And there is no point pretending it wouldn’t happen, people are people and sometimes they react horribly to difference. And then you can be somewhat guilty by association. And just as prone to jibes about it.

I get why my brother and his partner would seek to shield their sons from all of that side of the world. That “Adam & Eve, Not Adam & Steve” sort of viewpoint about gender and sexuality is still alive and well unfortunately. And this is where one of my greatest fears starts to nip at my heels. My friends’ children are still young enough to perhaps not fully understand what I am or for that to have impacted on them too heavily I hope. But one day someone will make a comment around it and they will have a difficult choice. Because of me.

But I think I’m mentally prepared for when or if that day arrives. I’m going to put my faith in good parenting, hope their acceptance continues through potentially difficult enough teenage years and hold to this notion that “you won’t fool the children of the revolution”. Because they get it already. And for them, people really are just people.


Be Proud Of Yourself

This weekend is particularly important in the Glasgow LGBTQI Calendar. And I’m kind of fortunate to have been working the Glasgow Pride event in various capacities. And a variety of different hats. Participant, volunteer and also as a Union representative. I’m grateful for all of those opportunities to be honest. It kind of really matters.

I was never that militant when I lived a straight, closeted life. I still didn’t believe in inequality but I had yet to feel it so personally keenly. And you can trust me when I say there is a world of difference between being a Straight White Male and a Straight White Shemale. I found that out the hard way.

Amd yet the world I currently inhabit is full of hope to me. To see thousands march today on a simple principle that we deserve equality is emboldening. Nobody should ever have to hide who they really are. And in Glasgow, I genuinely believe we are nearly there. The reaction from the public that lined the streets tells me we are so accepted. Small pockets of ignorance aside.

But in 2017 I can live openly as a Transgender Female and receive next to no grief for that fact. I am exceptionally proud of my city, my friends and their children (More on that next time). So no matter how you identify, be proud of who you are! Shout it as loud from the rooftops as you see fit. Or not if that’s your choice. But nobody ever gets to tell you that you are not somehow good enough. My own favourite definition of the term gay was that it stood for “Good As You”. Fucking Amen to that!

And just because a close friend quotes it to me frequently, I’m going to finish with a Rupaul quote,

“If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

Love yourself and love the ones you’re with!










Written In The Stars

I’ve always hoped that people get why I always post a video with each post. I strongly suspect that they do but for the sake of clarity, a small explanation. I love music and I love language. This medium allows me to collide both. And it allows me to unify an image in a way nothing else ever can. I simply love that. A small window into how I actually think about the world. It’s one of my favourite things. Because even though you might be a stranger, you know me a little bit through this. But I was supposed to be blogging about something. So I shall.

I could never have been able to predict just how good my transition would eventually turn out to be. I had no Magic 8 ball to give me even the slightest clue. And still it turned out better than I ever imagined.

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade was the sort of advice I used to abhor. It’s actually not that bad a motto. The Transgender journey is not desperately easy but it is entirely doable.

A lot of it is entirely down to choice, in my opinion. You can choose your battles, what you allow power over you and you can always choose who you wish to be. I choose to be a strong and confident woman. Sometimes despite myself. Because I have people who hold me up.

So I didn’t do so alone. Everyone who came with me matters to me very much. In no matter how small a way they may think. I don’t think enough of them realise just how much. They are my strength. Day to day. That’s how I am able to manage all of it. And now, when everything seems possible, those are the ones I want to thank the most. Because they let me fulfill the dream I had. In tiny, beautiful ways. Like just She and Her. And it’s those folk, rather than the stars, that point to my future. God bless’em.


Love The Ones You’re With

Not been paying too much attention to this blog lately. Life has just gotten in the way. Tumbling through one shitty situation after another as it happens. Not that I’m remotely alone in this. Almost everyone I care about has been touched by some unasked for heartache of late. But at the end of the day, we all have each other. And that’s pretty much all that matters when you get right down to it. Everything else can and will pass. Keep the Aspidistra flying!