Balancing Act

A total hotch potch of a week. And one which brought into sharp focus what it means to be Transgender in a modern city.

I have grown to become a ridiculously confident Transsexual Woman. That is how I define myself. I will never have a uterus so Woman is perhaps a stretch too far for many.

But Woman I am. The only question is the perception of others. And that is a hugely mixed bag, if I am honest. And I don’t object to any of the distinctions that can be made. It feels cruel at times but it is certainly disarmingly accurate. I can offer no riposte.

I am lucky enough to have been born in Glasgow though. If you weren’t, you have my eternal pity. It’s a strange lovely little city that feels personal connection like few others. You will sit at bus stops and instantly exchange life stories without abandon at a moment’s notice with complete strangers. It’s just how we are.

So it was perfectly comfortable for a stranger to turn to me and say “I’m not being cheeky but did you used to be a guy?”. There was no malice intended. Just a fellow citizen’s natural curiosity piqued. I adore that. They can ask. Because they are just like me. Trying to find their way. And questions are great. That’s how we learn. And that’s where I can educate.

He was lovely and entirely respectful. Just a bit confused by my presentation and then my actual voice. So he asked his questions because I was there, in front of him. And I answered because that is how people learn that Trans folk are not alien.

And none of his questions were horrible. He wanted to know when I knew I was “different”, how people treated me, if I had loved ones and finally, if I was happy. And then he congratulated me on all that I’ve been through and wished me the best. Sounds like a lot. About 6 minutes all in. We Glaswegians are efficient communicators.

For about an hour I was elated at this small success. And then….two teenage Glaswegian girls walked past and loudly commented ” Did you see it?”. Me being “It”. That’s just a fantastic leveller. They weren’t being horrible. Just young and with no frame of reference for what I am. That’s allowed too.

So the point of this post is because of them. Learn to take the rough with the smooth. I came to no harm. I had a really great experience then an equally shit experience. I prefer to think they cancel each other out. Life is just as good as you can allow it to be. Mine is fucking brilliant because of all the good people that inhabit it. I wish you nothing but the same. People are the glue that hold you together when times are tough. And when they aren’t.

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