With each passing day I’m getting happier with what I see. Not in a horribly vain way. It’s just there is no longer a disconnect with me and the person looking back in the morning. I’m reasonably confident this is a positive thing.
Just being yourself is an amazing thing. And I don’t mean to sound deep. Most of us take it for granted. You literally don’t know any other way to be.
But being transgender or gender dysphoric is exactly the opposite of that. A terrible sense that something isn’t right. And I know that feeling. I consider myself fortunate though that I have never experienced body dysphoria. But I was clearly dysphoric enough to change my gender representation and probably ultimately my gender itself.
But it is very comforting to look in the mirror of a morning and start to glimpse someone I recognise as me. Slowly but steadily getting there and it feels good.
I wish nobody had to feel that disconnect. And that it wasn’t so difficult for some people to just allow themselves to be themselves. But for now, I’m happy just to be able to face myself. And occasionally smile back.